I waded into the water. It seemed like it had taken hours to get from the high beach down to this dark shore. The existence of the vast ocean hit my feet, stinging them raw. On I moved, and the waves, crawling up the hard packed sand, lapped at my ankles. My toes were numb now but I could still feel the earth below me and I used it to ground myself.
Dreams cascaded from my mind, spilling out of my ears and dripping from my hair. They landed, splashed into the water, but it was only a mere second before they had completely vanished. Years of thought, rolling each idea into something more, polishing them like pearls. Gone. They sunk into the ocean floor and would never return to me, nor I to them.
I was deeper in now, and the dark blue hugged closely to my thighs and beckoned for me further. I didn’t know how to turn around, my neck was locked and my eyes fastened on the horizon. My body was two, one of the land and one of the sea. The wind whipped salt into my eyes and matted my hair to my cheek. The waves roared ahead of me like a freight train but soothed themselves just before they reached me. I hadn’t reached their crests yet.
I would, I was now determined in that. My head was empty but for that thought. One pearl left and it belonged to the ocean, coaxing me further in.
I could not stop.
I had always aimed to please at the expense of myself.